someone gave me something nice …

Waaaaaaaay back in February, my sweet friend Sheri was kind enough to give me this thoughtful award. Thank you, Sheri! Now, I don’t normally “play” memes and such, but good golly, Sheri has given me countless hours of delight through her blog. She has a sense of humor that I can relate to, a delicious sense of irony and her kids just say the funniest things! (The apple obviously doesn’t fall far from the tree!) If you want a few moments of absolute delight, go pay Sheri a visit. You’ll be glad you did!

I’m supposed to share seven things about me. So just because it’s you, Sheri, here goes.

1. One of the people I’d most like to emulate is … Kwai Chang Caine. Yes, that Caine, played by David Carradine in the classic 1970s TV show Kung Fu. Something about that character seemed to crack something open in me and made me want to have that same sense of balance, peace and spiritual understanding.

Master Po: Close your eyes. What do you hear? Young Caine: I hear the water, I hear the birds. Po: Do you hear your own heartbeat? Caine: No. Po: Do you hear the grasshopper which is at your feet? Caine: Old man, how is it that you hear these things? Po: Young man, how is it that you do not?

2. I love aqua. It makes me happy. I love colors that are cheery and fun. Neutrals just don’t do it for me. I painted my dining area Aqua Spray around ‘03, then later painted my entry Surfer (a deeper aqua), then my living room Valley Mist (pale aqua/green/blue that changes with the light; love it!). I have aqua pillows, candles, accessories. I decorate with seashells and sand in bowls and trays. I love the energy in my home. I call it my sacred space.

3. I love my yoga practice. I have fibromyalgia and spondylolisthesis and the physical practice of yoga helps hugely with easing the pain and getting me to a peaceful place. I love learning about the eight limbs of yoga, learning about pranayama (breath), ahimsa (non-violence), pratyahara (non-attachment) and so much more.

4. My favorite movie is Heidi. I love all Shirley Temple movies. They make me happy. But Heidi is my favorite; the way a little girl’s love transforms an old man’s heart … sigh …

5. An old boyfriend once told me “You know what the problem is, Rose? You don’t’ need me.” That puzzled me initially. I wanted him, but I didn’t need him. I’m just not a needy person. Neediness is not my thing. I love the Buddhist tenet: Want less. Suffer less. It’s not the lack of something that makes us unhappy. It’s the wanting that makes us unhappy. How many times do people think “if I only had that special thing, I’d be happy?” Shortly after getting it, they’re unhappy again. Let it go. Release wanting. Be at ease. Fill your heart with love and then fill every molecule of your being with love, letting the warm goodness ooze from every pore.

6. Fave book: Happy Yoga: 7 Reasons Why There’s Nothing To Worry About by Steve Ross. It’s a wonderful guide for living and happiness. I’ve read it; I’ve re-read it. I can open it to any page and find a wisdom that I can use in the moment. Wonderful book. I recommend it to everyone.

7. Family: I have two brothers who I love to spend time with. They “get” me. We can talk and laugh for hours. I have an amazing daughter, wonderful son-in-law and two sparkling granddaughters. My mom’s soul parted from her body in 1990; I miss her physical self, her softness, her smile, but I feel her constant love. My dad is my hero; I’m happy that he’s still on this side to make me laugh and hold me with love. I have an abundance of cousins; many of whom I’m very close to. I have three close almost-brothers; we met when I was married and we grew into a family after I divorced.

So those are seven random things. Of course, I’m thinking about changing some of them already—ha!—but I’ll let ‘em be. I’m supposed to pass on the award to seven other bloggerss, but I’ll have to skip that part, if it’s OK. Life has been moving at warp speed lately and I haven’t spent enough time enjoying my favorites. I do recommend everyone on my blog list at the right, though. From spirituality to décor to travel, there’s a little something for everyone. Check ‘em out!

Namaste … Grasshopper …

Being with what is …

I have a wonderful, grace-filled friend who has a debilitating chronic illness; each day, her symptoms can change, and they’re usually not very pleasant changes. And yet, she remains a whole, wonderful, amazing gift to those who know her and are inspired by her and her wisdom and grace.

Recently she posted:

“Time, patience, sitting, being with what is, watching it unfold, turn, expand, shrink, stay, move forward and onto another awareness altogether …”

I told her that I should write “being with what is” on my blackboard as a reminder. Her response:

“We so often think we can avoid "what is" particularly when "what is" is unpleasant...NOPE...it still "is". ..well until it becomes "was"...or we run towards "will be"...but come on, lets face it ..."IS," is where we are actually living and breathing.”

How often do we resist “what is?” A chronic illness, loss of a job, divorce, death … some things cannot be changed, others can be changed over time, but in the meantime, we have to be with what is at that moment. I’ve shared many times that one of my favorite mantras is “Receive what you have been given.” When I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 1995, I did not receive or accept the diagnosis; I resisted. I continued to search for other answers, something that could be fixed. I finally had to receive what I’d been given and once I did that, I could learn and grow and find what modalities would work for me in managing the pain and avoiding situations that triggered it. It took several years, but I do OK now. I spent too much time, though, not receiving, not being with what is. Resistance was futile. As my friend reminds me: All is welcome. ALL is welcome. all IS welcome. all is WELCOME.

The Buddhists believe that resistance causes needless suffering. When we resist what is, we can’t move forward. We uselessly fight what is un-fightable. Through the usual gamut of life challenges, I feel I’ve learned the lesson pretty well now, not perfectly, but pretty well. When I was laid off last year, I didn’t spent time fretting over it.  I worked at finding a new job, but I didn’t worry. I accepted my situation and worked to change it over time. I now trust that I will land where I’m supposed to land and that things will work out the way they’re supposed to (even if it’s not what I would choose).

Bruce Lee expressed this lack of resistance as being fluid, like water:

Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way round or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves.

Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water my friend.

May we learn to Be with what is. Be like water.

Namaste

Thank you, Laura!