Sunday, September 12, 2010

The Parable of the Old Man and the Horse


Watch a young child when he is first learning to walk, taking those Frankenstein steps, arms raised up instinctively for balance. Oops! Fell down. The child gets on all fours, gets back up again and continues lumbering.

Watch children playing in a playground, running, jumping, falling, getting back up and doing it all again (assuming no one gets hurt, of course).

A baby playing on a beach might get sand in her mouth, and sputters to get it out, her little sandy tongue pushing and instinctively spitting.

One of the great things we can learn from kids (especially young ones, before they’ve unlearned their magic) is to not judge events like these. A fall is just a fall. It’s neither good nor bad, really. It is just a fall and that is all it is. Things just are what they are, until we attach a judgment to them. (Kids are such wonderful teachers, aren’t they?)

When I fell and broke my ankle a couple of months ago, friends commiserated, some saying, “Oh, that’s terrible.” Is it terrible, though? Or is it just a fall? Is it just a broken ankle? Inconvenient, at times challenging, but it’s really neither bad nor good. It just IS.

Another friend recently posted an article about a product’s possible dangers. Some responded “Oh, that’s scary!” Is it?  If we don’t assign a judgment, it’s just information to consider and use to make consumer choices about the product.

We have a tendency to assign judgments to things so readily. Neighbors hollering and enjoying an afternoon football game could be an annoyance to some … or it could just be neighbors enjoying a game.

~ ~ ~

An old man lived in a tiny village, and although poor, he had a good, hard-working horse to help him on his farm. “You are lucky to have such a fine horse!” his neighbors told him.

One day, the horse was not in the stable. “What a tragedy!” his neighbors said. “You will not be able to care for your farm and your crops will rot. What a curse!” The old man responded, “Don’t speak too quickly. Say only that the horse is not in the stable. That is all we know; the rest is judgment. Who knows what is good or bad?”

After a few days, the horse returned … and brought several other wild horses with it into the corral. “You are so blessed! You now have a whole herd!” the man’s neighbors said. He replied “Say only that the horse has returned and brought other horses with him. Who knows what is good or bad?”

The man’s eldest son went out to break the horses and was thrown and broke his leg, right at harvest time. The neighbors came and said, "Your son that you count on is injured. You are so unfortunate!." He only replied, "Say only that my son broke his leg. That is all we know. Who knows what is good or bad?”

A week later, a general of the army came to the village and drafted all the young men of the village to go off and fight a dangerous war, sparing the old farmer’s son because of his broken leg. The villagers came to the old man crying because their sons had been taken. “You are so fortunate your son’s leg was broken! Our sons may never return.” The old man replied “Do not judge or say what is a blessing or a curse. Say only that your sons had to go to war and mine did not. The rest is not known.”

~ ~ ~

A wretched curse and a blessing are only distinguished by one’s perception. It’s not easy to alter one’s perception, but with practice, we can unlearn our tendencies to judge and be more like the little children we once were. We can accept that a broken ankle is just a broken ankle. We can accept that what is, sometimes just is.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

a little alone time …

052310 scenic view fog

Settle yourself in solitude, and you will come upon God in yourself. ~ St. Teresa of Avila

Solitude – we live in such a hustle-bustle world that solitude and quiet can seem hard to come by. It can be challenging to find true silence.  Everywhere there is noise assailing us: on video screens in the grocery store’s check-out line; from people’s cellphone conversations; traffic noise; children playing; radios and TV blaring. Many of us have difficulty finding a place of solitude when there are children to care for, jobs to do, errands to run. I know of folks who always have the TV or radio on to have “background noise.” Many people feel uncomfortable and squirmy in silence.

Silence provides peace and calm to the spirit. It can have a physical effect, lowering blood pressure, tension and anxiety. (Listen to loud, raucous music for a few minutes, then turn it off. You can almost feel your body say “aaaaahhh …”) Silence allows us to go within to hear the voice of the Divine. The voice of the Divine doesn’t yell and jump up and down to get our attention. It doesn’t shout; it whispers … gently, in our hearts. Yes, it’s also present in each moment of our day-to-day lives, but when we want to really touch and engage with our Divine consciousness, it can be best to find a quiet place of solitude, free from any distractions.

To find her quiet place, a friend spent time sitting under a Banyan tree each day to reflect and to write. A friend in Hawaii swam with the turtles. My mother used to sit in her big upholstered rocking chair, rosary beads in her hands, her children playing around her, eyes closed, lost in the ecstasy of prayer. Jesus often went off by himself to pray, out in the wilderness, up on a mountain, to a “lonely place.” When my ex-husband left us, I went to the beach nearly every day, just sitting and watching the waves come in and go out, gaining peace from just being in a quiet place and feeling the presence of the Divine with me, making me feel safe and Loved.

091109 waves II

The act of solitude—of removing oneself from the distractions and chaos—gives us a quiet place to Be, to listen, to hear the voice of the Divine whispering in our hearts. It might be out on a hike, pausing to quietly gaze at the natural creation around us. Or on the ocean on a surfboard, bobbing up and down in rhythm with the waves. On a beach, in a garden, in a park, in a quiet place at home.

We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness.
God is the friend of silence. ~ Mother Teresa

052310 pink gauraEach morning, I spend those first quiet minutes in bed feeling the energy of Love in my life. I awaken happy and joy-filled, connecting with the Divine consciousness present in all of life—in the trees outside my window, in the chattering of the squirrels, in the light of the day. Afterward, I sit quietly on the floor, breathing full, deep, lung-filled breaths at first, then just sitting. Nothing to do, nothing to undo. Just sit and Be. In those quiet moments I can best hear the Divine whispering in my heart, starting my day.

How do you find peace and solitude in your life?